MY DAY WITH A CATHOLIC NUN: SISTER MARY

Over the last many years, I have closely and secretly held very high sensitive secrets of my colleagues who include a few politicians, priests, professional colleagues, myself, my wife and ofcourse secrets sorrounding a few pretty, cute and elagant African ladies.

However, I publicly need to mention what am about to, to give details on, though not a secret. It's about this Catholic Nun. A nun I met earlier today while I traversed Muranga County in fulfillment of my employment obligations while am still relevant. Mnajua hizi kazi mnafanya nyinyi wote si za mama yenu. You have to remain relevant at long as you stay. Anyway, just like many Christians would conclude, meeting this Catholic nun was God planned.

Sister Mary

The nun goes by the name Sister Mary. Her beauty struck my attention and without hesitation I commenced the conversation with my new friend. For a moment, I kept off my arms and fingers from my laptop and concentrated into making Sister Mary speak out. I kept watching her eye lashes. Her lashes resembled those of my daughter. Cute lashes that got my eyes glued to her for a while. And before I sink down to my bullet point, I have always wondered WHY such a beautiful, fashionable, stylish, elegant, cute, disciplined and sexy lady would choose a celibacy life. I know the absolute answers to my wonders will not be fully answered by any of you. But the obvious response from anyone of you skimming through this article will be, "She choose celibacy to serve God". You would add and say, "Celibacy is a calling". That's nonsensical thinking comrades. Nothing is usually a calling. The so termed "callings" are made at the back of our mind, nothing spiritual. But I hold a fact that it's your conscience that forgets God at some point in history said, "A woman will leave her parents to form a union with the man". If Riungu Snr maintained his celibacy, then you would not have these brilliant brains by the name Riungu Jnr. That's how bad celibacy can be. Anyway, am not into preaching. If I decided to preach, even Apostle James Ng'ang'a would precisely and correctly express himself in the acceptable queens language. Am that powerful when it comes to matters about spirituality and theology.

My point is not about preaching today. Its about this Sister Mary. Sister Mary is cute and pretty. I exactly told her so and she smiled naively and shyly set off her eyes from mine. At that turn point, I recalled that I have diverse knowledge on theology and any move by Sister Mary to introduce Godly matters, will be met by the same force from me. I looked back straight into her eyes and asked, "Sister Mary, would you kindly mind me having your cell phone number"? She stretched her white head gear lobe and said, "of course yes". From a far, I could read some love, romance in the air. At that moment, I remembered Kiraitu Murungis' statement on how poor Meru men are in loving and romancing. I quickly rubbed off that statement from my mind and silently came back to my senses and responded to her, "Thank you pretty Sister Mary".

Have met Sister Mary today. A cute and pretty woman just like and other lady. Just like the devil tempted Jesus in the wilderness, my task now is to test the strength of her celibacy oath. I can almost be sure that she will give in to my dinner date. A date where we will not discuss Godly matters but social, political matters and wildly matters concerning the associations with the opposite sex. I guess the latter would be more interesting.

Sister Mary, be ready to tell me in black and white why you chose celibacy. Was it poverty that forced you into the missionary seminary sponsored by the Catholic Church like many other priests and nuns I know of? Sister Mary, be ready to diverge to me on whether you don't get sexual desires like just any other woman. Pretty Sister Mary, be prompt to respond to my question on how you fulfill your sexual desires. And lastly, be ready to quit sisterhood when you meet me again; not that I will seduce you into anything but I will convince you why God would appreciate such a pretty lady to have a husband and a family to cater for. Am already into the marriage wilderness Sister Mary- forget me. I will also pray hard to ensure that our date matures. Until we meet again Sister Mary, my dreams of meeting you remains valid and my wonders as to why you chose celibacy life remains a grain in the desert; hope you will get me answers to my puzzles on our long awaited dinner date.